Internet Milk

[Bronyaur]

if you haven't read this yet and have time to kill...

http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/customer-reviews/B00032G1S0/ref=cm_cr_dp_2_1/103-3528501-3649466?redirect=true&ie=UTF8&customer-reviews.sort_by=-SubmissionDate&n=3370831

P.S. I'm upset, I actually beat level 49 on City Jumper (stupid level) for the high score but the WEBSITE WAS DOWN WHEN I FINISHED so it didn't update. /angry Bret

[Miro]

wtf is this greta...

[Bronyaur]

update: I just got 50 again, dang website. Level 50 is worse than 49...

nothing to do with the link. :)

[Serenity]

When Jason came home from school, he poored a glass of rich, smooth Tuscan whole milk and also decided that he wanted some cookies. He climbed on top of the counter and, reaching for the cookie jar, slipped from the countertop. The cookie jar full of Brian's ashes and the glass of milk both tumbled to the floor. At the sound of the crash, Cindy and I rushed into the kitchen, and were astonished to see that the ashes were mixing with the milk to form the likeness of a human. Over the course of several minutes, we watched in disbelief as our son was revived before our eyes. I cannot describe to you the joy of having our son back. But we don't know how to explain to our son what happened, or why he has a pool table in his room, or what mommy and daddy did with his college fund.

My Favorite



When you have mega corporations like HOOD out there with accusations of cow abuse and using steroids, its tough to recommend any milk company. I personally have my own cow that I milk, and I guess that is the only type of milk I can recommend, go out and buy a cow. Oh yea, and some gloves too.


I bought this milk a few days ago; it arrived today, and when I opened it, it was a literal explosion of rainbows and kittens. No cows could have made this milk. No, I suspect unicorns.



While the crisp white color of the milk is a bonus, I have to give this milk only 4 stars because it's so limited in its uses. Besides drinking it, I can't find any other application that doesn't leave a sticky, flaky mess when it dries out.

Will try dusting with it tomorrow.



I was suspicious of purchasing milk over the internet, but the slighly larger "head shots" of the jug convinced me that this milk is great stuff.

Once I got it home my whole fridge seemed to glow, it caused my Cheerios to burst into uncontrollable flames, I love Tuscan milk, buy some today.

[Serenity]

Some are just really good writers:


He always brought home milk on Friday.

After a long hard week full of days he would burst through the door, his fatigue hidden behind a smile. There was an icy jug of Tuscan Whole Milk, 1 Gallon, 128 fl oz in his right hand. With his left hand he would grip my waist - I was always cooking dinner - and press the cold frostiness of the jug against my arm as he kissed my cheek. I would jump, mostly to gratify him after a time, and smile lovingly at him. He was a good man, a wonderful husband who always brought the milk on Friday, Tuscan Whole Milk, 1 Gallon, 128 fl oz.

Then there was that Friday, the terrible Friday that would ruin every Friday for the rest of my life. The door opened, but there was no bouyant greeting - no cold jug against the back of my arm. There was no Tuscan Whole Milk in his right hand, nor his left. There came no kiss. I watched as he sat down in a kitchen chair to remove his shoes. He wore no fatigue, but also no smile. I didn't speak, but turned back to the beans I had been stirring. I stirred until most of their little shrivelled skins floated to the surface of the cloudy water. Something was wrong, but it was vague wrongness that no amount of hard thought could give shape to.

Over dinner that night I casually inserted,"What happened to the milk?"
"Oh,"he smiled sheepishly, glancing aside,"I guess I forgot today."

That was when I knew. He was tired of this life with me, tired of bringing home the Tuscan Whole Milk, 1 Gallon, 128 fl oz. He was probably shoveling funds into a secret bank account, looking at apartments in town, casting furtive glances at cashiers and secretaries and waitresses. That's when I knew it was over. Some time later he moved in with a cashier from the Food Mart down the street. And me? Well, I've gone soy.

[Bronyaur]

yeah i really liked that last one you quoted

I love the ones are the ones with bad reviews and they complain about defects or something